Memories

I once did remember…
But it was so long ago…
How did it happen…?
What exactly did happen…?
We were such good friends, but…
Now…
Why do I hate you…?

All I can see is your face…
All I can hear is your voice…
Your laughter…
Your grace…
Why did you have to betray me…?

I knew that we never got along…
Well, we did, but that was long ago…
Then times changed and we weren’t friends…
But we promised we’d stay forever…!

I cry… It hurts…
Without you here beside me…
What I said to you—I shouldn’t have…
It stings like needles… It bites like the wind on a cold, winter’s night…
When you went running, I did too…

I wish that I had never said that…
I wish you hadn’t fought me…
I wish that only we could be friends…
I wish you would only understand…

You will never forgive me…
We are much too different—the same…
What we said will be nothing but a memory of a time…
That we tried to be…
Who we were meant to be…

I want to die…
I want to just… just die… here… now…
It hurts too much… It gags me to think…
My tears fall hard, but they feel weak…
I feel weak…
Why can’t they fall harder…?
Can’t my eyes turn into rain…?

I punish myself…!  I hurt myself…!
Don’t let others see the physical pain…!!
These bruises… This pain…
It will be my invisible promise…
If they can’t see it…
Then they will never know…
…And I can keep on doing it…

You are gone now…
You have left me to be alone…
You were the one I formed my first friendship with…
But sadly, it has come and gone…
Gone…
GONE!!!

I hate you!!!  I wish you’d die!
I wish that only you’d never did this to me…!
Why did you act so kind to me in the first place
If we were going to become mortal enemies afterwards!?
That’s bullshit!  Don’t lie to me!
Don’t stand there looking dumb while things build up inside me!

I will get you…!
I will get you…!
I… will… get… …
…I’ve hurt you…
Now you’re gone…
Why can’t I see…
…When my eyes are open…?

Friend… my friend…
Please… come back…
Please… help… me…